Thursday, 23 May 2013

JILTING YOUR PAST


BURNING THE BRIDGE

I know sometimes you feel like washing some thoughts of your mind. Yet, the harder you try, the hardest such thoughts permeate, soaking your thoughts and predominating your thoughts. While I was still freaked by the secular R&B, some ladies called, ENVOGUE sang, ‘don’t let go’.
 It is a song that still drops the drizzle of its melody and lyrics into my mind, like...

‘Hold me tight and don’t let go...’

Yes,
Like some memories, it isn’t that you don’t release them to go, but they just don’t want to. While I sat for my common entrance in the year 1997/1998, I sang a song by R. Kelly, ‘I believe I can fly’. While singing that new release then, Pauline (if she remembers) made a comment and it stuck into my memory even till now.

To some of us, it was a parting kiss, embrace that we can’t just forget, we can’t just let go. Some of us, it is a love that is long lost and we wish we could get them back or perhaps, relive those moments. In the variables of our lives we all have had experiences, heard words, done things we can’t forget even as we work hard to let it go.

Yet,
There are some that we cherish like heaven. Times when we became born again, built our first house, had our first degree or met a target.
About me?
I do have varieties of such. Like people that I wished I had whispered the words I wanted or they wanted to hear to. In my solitude, I join the bits and pieces wandering with wonder what would be or would not be if I had said those things or taken those actions. It only leaves me with a decision, ‘when I want something and I see it, I will go for it avidly’.

Yet,
I have learnt in life that you can’t have it all. Those wished memories are just one of the variables of your life’s desires that may of may not come true. But, as I have learnt from The Book that; ‘Godliness with contentment is great gain’. I will keep following my path, bury the memories of what I can’t have and embrace the ones I have, thus making me happy, ‘cause I have learnt that this is the only gift of love that we can give ourselves in our lifetime, ‘there is nothing left for a man than to enjoy his lot in life’. I didn’t say that, the Preacher in the Christian Book said so.

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